MIAMI UPDATE

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

Supposedly there will be a line at the 10 year FF celebration where those who wish to give Coach L oral pleasure and/or donate to the Hurricanes program can do so before the gratititous self-congratulations begin.
Will TOC and Alan Merten attend to give their apologies for drawing the line at four raises in six years for coach, and pledge everlasting eternal loyalty to the half Cuban, half Irishman?

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

Trouble brewing down south.

Word is Coach L pulled his groin pretending to be Jewish kneeling at Temple and is out 2-3 months.

For those that don't know, L frequently changes his heritage/religion/hairstyle as needed to land recruits. Here Coach Larranagastein was trying to land this year's "Jewish Jordan" but hurt himself paying homage to the God as depicted in the old testament.

How low our once beloved Coach L has stooped. Look at your false idol now, injured trying to bring in a jewish recruit to take Matt Damon's spot at quarterback.

 

[Patriot Lawdog]

Trouble brewing down south.

Word is Coach L pulled his groin pretending to be Jewish kneeling at Temple and is out 2-3 months.

For those that don't know, L frequently changes his heritage/religion/hairstyle as needed to land recruits. Here Coach Larranagastein was trying to land this year's "Jewish Jordan" but hurt himself paying homage to the God as depicted in the old testament.

How low our once beloved Coach L has stooped. Look at your false idol now, injured trying to bring in a jewish recruit to take Matt Damon's spot at quarterback.

And you'll always be a prick, won't you, Jollay?

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

And you'll always be a prick, won't you, Jollay?

I'm a prick? I'm a prick?

Well, never thought about it, but I suppose I am!

I'll admit it, will Larranaga?

 

[Patriot Lawdog]

I'm a prick? I'm a prick?

Well, never thought about it, but I suppose I am!

I'll admit it, will Larranaga?

Please tell me you got School Ties reference.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

Eh, no. Won't you threw me off, but I got it now. Well played.

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

Bahahahhhahahhhahha

I mean, no chance a Cuban who renounces his Irish background wins on St. patrick'$ day, but Larranaga and Miami are flaming out like only a broken down old coach could.

Up 10-0, now down 49-32. Hilarious.

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

I mean, at least only 75 people saw us play like shit against Loyola parentheses Maryland, a NATIONAL TRU TV AUDIENCE of like a thousand people are watching Larranaga embarrass himself!

 

[GMUgemini]

I mean, at least only 75 people saw us play like shit against Loyola parentheses Maryland, a NATIONAL TRU TV AUDIENCE of like a thousand people are watching Larranaga embarrass himself!

I know why, the CBS Sports box score has MSU with 16 players on their roster!

 

[GMUgemini]

Oh, it's getting ugly.

 

[GMUgemini]

This Marquette, South Carolina game is heating up, though.

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

Good news, a**-kissers.

Your shape-shifting money-coveting Cuban prophet is in town today recruiting PVI's Brandon Slater. He might show up at Brion's Grille if you want to wait there in an effort to kiss his wrinkly a** and get him to sign your bobbleheads.

 

[Pablo]

Good news, a**-kissers.

Your shape-shifting money-coveting Cuban prophet is in town today recruiting PVI's Brandon Slater. He might show up at Brion's Grille if you want to wait there in an effort to kiss his wrinkly a** and get him to sign your bobbleheads.

Brandon Slater Retweeted
Adam Zagoria‏@AdamZagoria Apr 17
2018 G Brandon Slater visits Villanova today and Maryland Thursday. Miami visits him Wednesday

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

If anyone knows his flight times, please post here.

Will give $74.99 to anyone that greets his flight at the gate with a poster that says "go back to Miami, money-grubbing, Cubish traitor. Go Mason."

Or any sort of words to that effect. Really not picky. But must have photo evidence to receive the $44.99.

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

Also, feel free Brandon to post here and let us know if Coach L was at all inappropriate in any way during his visit to your home. Stole silverware, made inappropriate Bill O'Reilly-type advances or comments, etc.

My advice is to not look him directly in the eye. He often perceives that as a direct challenge to his authority.

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

I was in Miami this week and A LOT of discontent brewing on campus.

Big donors NOT happy Slater committed to Nova and not the U.

Also whispers floating around about how the Diva is starting to take his toll on the other programs. The football team of course has underachived for years, but now the baseball team missed the postseason for the first time in 44 years.

One donor I talked to referred to Larranaga as an "energy vampire" who has sucked the resources out of other programs to maintain his mediocre program.

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

It has become apparent to this commentator that as bad as Hewitt was we really dodged a bullet not meeting the Diva's ridiculous demands to stay.

 

[Vurbel]

Surely are aren't implying Coach L is responsible for how the baseball team plays?

In other news, congrats to Bobby Bowden, Sam Cassell, Bob Sura, and Jimbo Fisher for Florida State winning the ACC baseball championship.

And Coach K for the success of the Duke debate team.

But it's Nick Saban's fault the Alabama forensics department isn't better.

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

Need better reading comprehension.

First of all, I am saying nothing. I am only relaying to you the word on the street. I am a journalist in the mold of a Cronkite or Blockstar--I only report what I hear, I do not let bias cloud the picture.

Second, as I said and you fail to comprehend, the Diva has demanded resources be siphoned to his program from elsewhere. I have heard the baseball team makes do with equipment much like the Major League Indians dealt with in the first movie, so L and his staff can fly first class on recruiting trips.

Stay tuned.

 

[Vurbel]

Need better reading comprehension.

First of all, I am saying nothing. I am only relaying to you the word on the street. I am a journalist in the mold of a Cronkite or Blockstar--I only report what I hear, I do not let bias cloud the picture.

Second, as I said and you fail to comprehend, the Diva has demanded resources be siphoned to his program from elsewhere. I have heard the baseball team makes do with equipment much like the Major League Indians dealt with in the first movie, so L and his staff can fly first class on recruiting trips.

Stay tuned.

Considering they get $7.5 million/year from adidas I doubt they have trouble with equipment.