Ebola discussion thread

[Pablo]

This is seriously the weirdest f*cking thread in the history of these boards (CAA Zone included). What in the world is the point of this?

Props to Jollay for starting this inspired thread that has clearly presaged the beginning of this season.

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

Gentlemen--

I would urge you call Mason sponsors and inform them that it is futile to advertise with the University with the threat of Ebola looming. Also inform them what the team's present record is and tell them that you do not like bad records, and thus the company should not advertise there.

In other news, Mali is added to the list of blacklisted Ebola countries. Guess the kids will have to flock somewhere else for Spring Break next March.

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

I get a lot of questions as you may know, so I apologize in advance for not getting to them all. You can send any you may have to jollayc@hotmail.com and depending on if I check email that week, you may or may not receive a response.

This comes from Hewittsucksabsolutecock in Hyannis Port:

Dear Jollay:

"Thank you for all you do for the Mason community, and, dare I say humanity, in the Ebola thread.

I was wondering--we have scheduled a lot of Ivy League schools lately. Why do you suppose Hewitt has done this? I know you sit behind the bench most games--have you spoken to Hewitt about the threat of Ebola?"

Thank you for your question Hewittsucksabsolutecock in Hyannis. Well, with a loss to Cornell this year and Princeton last, and a win over Princeton this year and Penn last, Hewitt has moved our career record against Ivy League schools from 4-0 to a much more impressive 6-2.

When I spoke to Paul last summer at his camp for disadvantaged youth, he told me his coaching staff and most of his players were pretty much just flat all dumb, and that by scheduling Ivy League schools he hoped something would rub off through "osbowsis." I am assuming he meant "osmosis," but I have learned not to correct the coach, as he can be very stubborn when he thinks he is right.

In any case, I have spoken to Paul numerous times about the threat from Ebola, but he seems to see it more as a potential "job-saver" than as something that could literally decimate the population. I will check back with him when the disease reaches Fairfax however.

Thanks for your question!

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

Breaking News--

A surgeon beating treated for Ebola in Nebraska has died. RIP, sir.

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

Hey everyone!!!

Get over to the Miami thread!! Could be a major upset brewing!!!

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

Standing ready to break open this thread at a moment's notice.

 

[Quentin Daniels]

Hey everyone!!!

Get over to the Miami thread!! Could be a major upset brewing!!!

So while you're off in the Miami thread f**k!ng around - this happens. What the Hell????

Emergency responders investigate possible Virginia Ebola case
http://news.yahoo.com/emergency-res...-170546894.html;_ylt=AwrSyCQmWe9UKB4AChfQtDMD

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

So while you're off in the Miami thread f*ck!ng around - this happens. What the Hell????

Emergency responders investigate possible Virginia Ebola case
http://news.yahoo.com/emergency-res...-170546894.html;_ylt=AwrSyCQmWe9UKB4AChfQtDMD

Ah...not to worry. False alarm.

I am ever vigilant, but there is no need to terrify the general public until really, I have a bad day or something.

 

[Quentin Daniels]

Ah...not to worry. False alarm.

I am ever vigilant, but there is no need to terrify the general public until really, I have a bad day or something.

Coming up on 4 years w/out an Ebola outbreak report.

Are we in the clear? Or are you just being a lame a** on the reporting? Or worse, part of the cover-up conspiracy?

 

[CHRISTOPHER JAMES JOLLAY]

I totally forgot. Thank you.

I think subconsciously I was hoping most of you just die, really. But now I see that it is only a few of you that really I hope catch on fire.

I will try and save as many as I can. As I can.